Crankypantsing

A Strange Epiphany

I bounced another check last week.  This is an on-going problem for me, not because I’m trying to be brimful of fail, but because I am, as I’ve always described it, math challenged.  I can add up a column of numbers ten times and come up with ten different answers.  And, yes, that’s while using a calculator. It’s a gift, I tell ya’, a gift I’d like to return to sender, CoD, thankyouverymuch.

I’ve sucked at math for as long as I’ve been aware there was such a thing as numbers.  I’ve been called stupid by various teachers and lazy by others. It took me three attempts to pass basic college math.  *Three*.  It wasn’t that the material was exceptionally difficult, and it wasn’t that I didn’t study or do my homework.  I truly tried.  I tried so hard that I just wanted to cry.  It was an awful experience.

So, once again reduced nearly to tears onna counta my Bad Math (those bloodsucking bastards at my bank charge $30 for NSF returns!), and completely unable to figure out where this particular math problem took a bad turn, I decided to do some Googling.  And, I’ll be damned!  There is actually a math learning disability called Dyscalculia.  Now, I know it’s easy to claim that you’ve got a learning disability, but gee, on the check-list of potential symptoms, I’m batting 1000.

It’s funny, because I never would’ve guessed that some of them were related.  When I meet people, I can’t recall what they look like.  There’s nothing quite like interviewing a bunch of potential employees, then not being able to visualize the one you want to hire.  Worse yet, not being able to recognize them when they return for training.  I can’t wear a watch, because I’ll look at it every two seconds.  Why?  Because my brain was unable to actually compute the time the previous thirty times I checked.  I can ask five times in one conversation “When is the party/meeting/whatever?” and still be unable to recall it two seconds after hanging up the phone.  I transpose numbers all the time.  Sometimes, I mistake letters for numbers and vice versa.  Or, I simply won’t see a number at all, especially if it’s the first digit in a string of numbers.  I often can’t make heads or tails of schematic drawings or diagrams illustrating physical actions (e.g. illustrated tutorials without accompanying text).  My brain and body just aren’t able to decode and mimic what my eyes are seeing.

Anyway, that was my epiphany for the day.  I now return you to your regularly scheduled activities.

Art, Bookarts

Book Binding Tutorial

Someone in one of my art or journalling groups (I can’t for the life of me recall which one) asked about hand binding her own journals. She’d tried following a Coptic binding tutorial, but couldn’t make sense of it. I told her I liked to use a bastardized version of Coptic binding to make my own journals, and that I’d try making an illustrated tutorial showing how I do it. So, that’s how I spent my weekend. I don’t know how successful it’ll prove to be, or whether it’ll be any clearer than some of the other tutorials out there. If anyone wants to try it and give me feedback, I’d welcome it.

Single Needle Chain Stitch Binding Tutorial

Now, if I could only recall which group the discussion occurred in…

Photography

A Walk in the Woods

The weather has been exceptionally pretty the past few days. Last Wednesday, after work, my camera and I took a walk in the woods. I wasn’t really dressed appropriately, as it was super muddy, but it was well worth slogging through the swampy bits.

I’ve tweaked the color a bit (lowering the saturation, increasing the contrast, decreasing the lightness, and upping the reds and yellows), because the originals were washed out. Sunny days are nice, but they really don’t make for the best photographs. The close-ups of the tree knot and the three trees with a board nailed across them were completely desaturated and had noise added. I left the fungus and the pictures with visible sky untouched.

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Crankypantsing, Pets, Photography

Happy Friday (Now New and Improved with Kisses!)

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Mmm-wah! Harriet Brown sends kisses. (For full effect, I strongly recommend clicking to view at full-size.)

I stayed up late last night to watch the end of the women’s long program. I like figure skating, but for some reason it just wasn’t as interesting as it could’ve been. It was not time well spent, unfortunately. Since I was up way past my bedtime, I intended to sleep in this morning. So when the phone rang at 6:45 ayem, I was not terribly amused. Janet Parker, whoever you are, would it’ve killed you to let the phone ring a couple more times? Because, the only thing worse than being waked up at the crack of dawn is hauling my lazy ass out of bed just in time for the phone to stop ringing. I wasn’t sleeping very heavily, so I know that I heard the first ring. She let it ring four times. Four! At 6:45 ayem! Give a girl time to get out of bed, for crying out loud. Grrr.

On the bright side, the sunrise was beautiful. I was too lazy (I mentioned the laziness, didn’t I?) to go inside and get my camera, so I have no photographic proof, but I promise it was lovely: neon pinky and orangy with streaks of purple and fuschia.

Now, I just need to convince my lazy ass that it needs to clean the house. I’m not feeling very motivated.

Ladybusiness, News & Politics

It Begins in South Dakota

And just when I was thinking this day would be an improvement over yesterday (it’s Friday for me, and Survivor is on tonight), there is this little news gem (via Feministing): South Dakota’s senate has passed an absolutely fucktacular piece of legislation that totally bans abortion. The only exception is if the mother’s life is at risk There are no exceptions for rape or incest, or for the protection of the mother’s mental or physical heath and well being. The state’s governor, who is of the anti-choice persuasion, still has to sign it into law, but there is absolutely no doubt that he will. The ramifications of this go way beyond women in South Dakota being unable to obtain in-state abortions. This is a stepping stone to the overturn of Roe v. Wade. It also opens the door for all sorts of squicky laws aimed at controlling the freedoms of women. Cuz, yaknow, we’re just big ol’ incubators with feet.

Un-fucking-believable.

Pets

Unconditional Love

Gina at Dogma, a pet writer whose blog I very much enjoy, posted yesterday on the subject of unconditional love. While I believe that dogs are capable of experiencing love, and I think that the majority of dogs develop bonds of love easily, I’m not in 100% agreement with her claim that dogs love unconditionally. It seems pretty clear to me that there are strings attached. Surely no one expects a dog whose owner mistreats him to unconditionally love his abuser?

For example: My own dog’s love is intertwined with her ability to trust. She does not trust many people, but those she does, she loves and would walk over hot coals to be with. But break her trust, and the love will disappear, as well. For Harriet, things like fairness and consistency are major components in the trust-love equation. She is bewildered by inconsistent treatment, and reacts by withdrawing and shutting down. She cools toward the person who breaks her trust and it can take a long time to rebuild it. “Fool me once…” she says. There are lots of strings attached to Miss Brown’s love, but that’s okay. Part of the bargain we struck was that I would be the one supplying the unconditional love and light refreshments. She just needs to bring the entertainment.

Crankypantsing

Oh Mah Gawd

I did, indeed, end up having to fill out an accident report. Because, you know, it could get infected and turn gangrenous and require amputation. Or something.

It seems to me that a good rule of thumb would be that if you are not hurt badly enough to leave work, then there is no need for an accident report. Likewise, if you must fill out an accident report, you are obviously too hurt to continue working, and must go home. Immediately.