Category: Crankypantsing

Crankypantsing, News & Politics

Instant Review: The Plague

Shelly

Students are back, and with them, all manner of disease and pestilence. I’ve managed to pick up something horrid, and it has taken up residence in my lungs. We are not amused. I suspect I caught it from someone at work, actually. On Friday, one of my coworkers was coughing and sneezing and generally sounding like she might expire at any moment. I assumed it was just allergies (tis the season!), but I have a feeling it was something more sinister. Normally, I wouldn’t be so cranky about it. It’s not her fault she’s sick. However, someone on our floor is going through cancer treatment, and we are under strict orders not to come to work sick, so that we don’t pass anything on to her. With her immune system compromised, it wouldn’t take much to make her very, very sick.

So, now my head feels like it’s about to implode and I’ve got some sort of crud in my lungs. I’m taking guaifenesin and drinking lots of water, like ya’ do, but sheesh! I want it gone NOW, please.

Speaking of the plague, I read that our president, in addition to presidentin’ and vacationatin’, has started reading books. Apparently, he was caught red-handed with a copy of Camus’ The Stranger. Now, I don’t know what someone who has systematically made fun of “educated folks” is doing reading books, but, if it’s true, I’m a little impressed. I mean, this is the guy who can’t even be bothered to read a newspaper!

Art, Crankypantsing, Photography

Bad Advertising, FedEx Sucks, and Arting Update

Shelly

Baby

You know that Progressive insurance commercial, that asks “If we’re this helpful while you’re shopping for insurance, imagine how helpful we’ll be when you need us.” That makes absolutely no sense, so I call bullshit. Any company is going to do whatever they can to make themselves look good to prospective customers. After they’ve hooked you, they don’t have much incentive to go out of their way to be helpful.

And while I’m being cranky, FedEx has climbed to the top of my corporate shit list. I ordered something on August 1. It was supposedly shipped on August 2. After a few days, I checked the tracking info, and found that the package had been placed on the truck, then apparently it warped into an alternate dimension. I figured it would show up eventually, and forgot about it. A couple of days ago, I received a postcard from FedEx–dated August 8!–stating that they needed additional delivery directions. Now, first, it took them a week to figure out they couldn’t find my place? I don’t think so. Second, why on earth did it take two weeks for the stupid postcard to get to me? That part of the problem may be the fault of the USPS. Delivery around these parts has gotten a bit random lately. However, FedEx should have provided better tracking info, and they should have informed me sooner that there was an issue. (And, no, they didn’t try to call, even though they had my phone number. If they had, it would’ve shown up on my caller ID. Hrmf!)

So, I called FedEx, as the postcard directed, and was told that the package has been returned to the vendor. I am not amused.

Now for an arting update: I’m working on a large-ish painting/assemblage something-or-other, using a wood panel as a support. I haven’t worked much on wood, so this should be entertaining. Whether that’s entertaining in the fun sense, or in the train-wreck sense, remains to be seen. If I don’t mention it again, you’ll know it did not end well.

In Art porn news, the new Dick Blick uber-catalog came today. Two copies of it, in fact, though one of them was, for some inexplicable reason, placed in my neighbor’s mailbox. I’d really like to know what the new mailwoman is smoking and/or drinking. I’ve taken to checking all three mailboxes, because my mail is regularly strewn between them. Serenity now!

(Photo: Baby circa 1920, another “yard sale box-o-junk” find)

Crankypantsing

Instant Review: Plague of Locusts

Shelly

Well, not locusts, exactly, but it is rather plague-like. The students have returned, and the Powers That Be have decided to extend move-in from one day to an entire week. Oh joy! When it was limited to one day, traffic was ungodly awful, but because it was only one day, it was easy to rearrange my schedule so that I was not near campus. Now, that’s not possible. On top of that, no one seems to have even a basic understanding of how stop signs work, and all along Jordan, 10th, and Fee, pedestrians just wander into the street whenever they feel like it. Dumbasses!

Oh, and to make things more exciting, some of the roads that were recently repaved have not yet been painted. It’s all sorts of fun to watch out-of-towners trying to navigate the unmarked streets, since they don’t know where the turn lanes are supposed to be, or even if there are turn lanes. Hello Dude in the White Suburban! Could you please scoot over a few inches, so that I don’t have to wait through three lights for you to get a chance to turn left? I’m sure the other 87 cars behind me–all of which also want to go straight–would appreciate it, too.

Crankypantsing, Pets, Photography

Useless Animals

Shelly

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Pandora

Harriet03a
Harriet

Before I got in the shower this morning, I left my clothes for the day–which included a black shirt–in a pile on my bed. Would anyone like to guess which useless animal decided to lie on them? Hint: Not the black one, because that would have been too easy. The worst part is actually that the hair in question has itty bitty barbs on it, so it weaves into fabric and is nearly impossible to brush off. It has to be removed hair by hair. If, that is, one removes it at all. I seem to be lacking that particular brand of motivation, so the hairs are staying right where they were shed.

Crankypantsing, Photography

The dragonfly forever passes like splintered diamond

Shelly

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White-faced Meadowhawk (Sympetrum obtrusum)

One of things I’m going to miss about living in the country is the abundance of wildlife. Of course, it’s also one of the things I won’t miss. Butterflies and dragonflies and big, fat bumblebees are all very nice, but raccoons tumbling across my roof at 2am is something I could happily live without. I also won’t miss ‘possums getting into the trash. And then there is the mowing. Dear lord, the mowing. That I won’t miss one little bit.

Instant Review: The Good Life (UK) / Good Neighbors (US)

This was another Netflix find. It’s a 28 episode series produced by the BBC in the mid-70s, about a suburban couple who quit the rat race in order to live self sufficiently. Their neighbors are exasperated (who wants pigs, goats, and chickens next door?), but are generally good sports. I’m finished with the first set of discs, and so far, it’s been thoroughly delightful.

The humor is smart, and, most interestingly to me, the main characters seem to actually like each other. I guess I’ve gotten so used to shows like Raymond or King of Queens, where the characters don’t like each other (and who can blame them, since most of them are pretty awful people?), that I kept waiting for the Goods to tear into each other. They don’t, though. Even when they’re making jabs at each other, it’s not mean. It seems to be more of an “I know you and we’re sharing an inside joke” sort of humor, instead of “I know you and I’m going take advantage of it to score a point off you.” Very nice!

Instant Review: Ragweed

I cannot unrecommend it enough.

Crankypantsing, Photography

Friday Report

Shelly

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We had a glorious sunset Wednesday evening. The sky was deep aquamarine with pinky-orange clouds. It was absolutely stunning. It didn’t last long, though. In the half minute it took me to run indoors and grab my camera, the colors were already fading.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Weather Report: It looks like it’s going to start raining any minute. O ick.

Road Report: They are finally starting to pave 17th street. Yesterday morning, as I went to work, the street zamboni was out. Only, instead of cleaning the street, it was parked right smack dab in the center of the Walnut & 17th intersection, with no one in it. I realize it was ass-early in the morning, and that things are pretty quiet with the students on break, but still, that’s no reason to park maintenance equipment in the middle of the freaking intersection. For added entertainment value, the Pepsi bottling company is on that intersection, and their trucks were having trouble pulling out and around the zamboni. Wheee!

Asshole Driver Report: I was behind an articulated logging truck this ayem. Good, good fun, that was. I was careful to stay well clear of him, which, of course, meant that the asswagon behind me was attached to my bumper. I just love it when people tailgate so closely that I can’t even see their headlights. Grrr. Also, too, additionally, as well, I have noticed that, since plastering the back of my car with all manner of pinko leftiness, folks slow down and crane their necks to look at the crazy person whenever I make a turn. Who knew that driving could be a form of performance art?

Big Brother Report: What is wrong with those people? They haven’t got a brain between the lot of them, and there isn’t a sympathetic one in the bunch. I can usually find someone I can talk myself into supporting, but this season, they all suck. I found it amusing last week, when Janelle nominated Erika for eviction, ostensibly on the grounds that she “despised” Erika’s “under the radar” style of game play. Well, they are all, with the possible exception of James (who is loathsome for other reasons) playing safe games. So far, none of them have been forced to do anything to rock the boat or to exceed their comfort zones. But, I’ll give George credit. He put James up for eviction. I didn’t think he’d have the guts, or, frankly, the brains, to do that.

Mary, Our Lady of the Chocolates Mary, Our Lady of the Chocolates

Virgin Mary Report: The Blessed Mother’s visage has turned up in a lump of chocolate (via CBS).

Sky Report: Nothing of note locally, because it’s too cloudy to matter, but if you live relatively northish or southish, keep an eye (or two!) out for aurorae. There is a coronal mass ejection headed toward Earth, which could result in aurora-producing geomagnetic storms either tonight or tomorrow. We don’t usually get aurorae this far south, but it can and does, occasionally, happen. More info is available at SpaceWeather.com. Be sure to check out the sunspot gallery, while you’re there.

Crankypantsing

Instant Review: Diet Cherry Coke

Shelly

First: Beware of the PepsiCokeSodaPop machine in the cafeteria, for it produces PepsiCokeSodaPops randomly. I was trying to get a Mello-w Yello-w, but instead was offered a diet cherry Coke. Not the same thing at all, nope, nope, nope.

As for the diet cherry PepsiCokeSodaPop itself, the less said of it the better. How do people drink this shit? It tastes not entirely unlike carbonated kerosene.

Kill me now.